A Day of Thanks

 

Wishing you all a very Blessed and Happy Thanksgiving!

I am thankful for all that I have......

Unicorns Aren't Just A Fantasy

When I was a little girl I was fascinated with Unicorns.  I collected Unicorns of all shapes and sizes in any kind of medium (clay, pewter, china, etc.).  My favorite was a glass Unicorn that was given to me by a person who didn't even realize how much I loved Unicorns.  About a year ago I felt like it was time to simplify my life and I cut my collection down to a precious few.

While I was cleaning our bedroom, I accidentally knocked over the case with my collection in it and all but one broke.  I knew then that it was time to stop living in the fantasy and threw those broken pieces in the trash.  At the time I didn't know that I was a real Unicorn myself.

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After almost three years and three miscarriages I've been diagnosed not only with abnormal Natural Killer Cells but with a Unicornuate Uterus, which is a congenital abnormality of the uterus.  There is a treatment for the Killer Cells, but not for the Unicornuate Uterus.

During fetal development (around 10 weeks) the Mullerian tubes (there are two) fuse together to create the uterus and they also form the fallopian tubes.  In my case one side did not develop creating a single horned uterus....hence the "Unicorn".   Basically, the right side formed and the left side didn't.  I have both of my ovaries, but I am missing the left fallopian tube and the left side of my uterus.  My uterus is only half the size of a normal uterus (which makes it hard to carry a child to term).  Also, because the kidneys are forming at the same time, many women who have this are missing one of their kidneys or they may even have deformed kidneys.  This is not the case for me.  I had an FL IVP done and I have both of my kidneys, which is good news.

Many women do become pregnant with this condition and do not even know they have this until they are faced with a breech birth.  Still others, have a hard time becoming pregnant, or have a hard time holding a pregnancy which sometimes results in multiple and mid term miscarriages.  For many women it is not until they seek infertility treatment that they end up finding out the truth.

There are so many risks associated with this condition.....I could have another miscarriage, I could go into preterm labor, I could be put on some form of bed rest for the duration, I could carry and give birth to a stillborn mid term, I could carry and my uterus could rupture......you get the picture.  Then again, the possibility exists that I could get that one sticky bean that will endure for the full term with little or no complications.  We just don't know......

Dr.P has recommended that we find a "gestational carrier". This means that we will be able to have our biological child since the eggs will come from me and the sperm will come from DH. It just means that I won't be the one to carry our child.  I will never know how it will feel to have a life kicking inside me.

I'm not sure yet where this journey will lead us as we have yet to make the big decisions.  This will be so much more expensive than just a 'simple' IVF procedure.  And there are so many laws that go along with this.  It is just so daunting!

Right now I'm doing my best to take each day as it comes.  I've joined an online support group for people with my condition and I'm hoping that there may be some helpful answers there.  I'm praying that the right answer will be just around the corner.  We've both been through so much!

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I started writing this post almost two weeks ago.  Since then I've "talked" to women who have UU like me via yahoo groups.  I've talked with my regular OBGYN in order to seek out his opinion.  I also took the time to email Dr. R who heads up the clinic where I'm currently seeking treatment.  I emailed her because I just couldn't imagine myself giving up the chance to carry my own child....especially when I have received hope from other UU women.  Her response to my email (less than 5 hours later) was to get us set up for a meeting less than 48 hours later (which she did not charge us for).  During the meeting she gave credence to our sliver of hope.  She insisted on sending us to a "pre-conception counseling appointment" with a local high risk OBGYN group.  She also encouraged us to seek the opinion of another doctor with another local group so that we can make a well informed decision as to what is right for us. 

We now have appointments set up (for the middle of the month) to meet with the high risk group and with the other doctor for the second opinion.  On one hand I'm trying to keep faith involved and stay positive.  On the other hand, I am trying to make sure that I'm not becoming overly optimistic because another let down might devastate me.

I don't know what this means for us, but I do know that whatever it does mean, it is worth the fight.



P.S.  To my friends who are finding out about this from this post instead of hearing it directly from me, please accept my sincerest apologies.  It is hard enough live with this on a daily basis.  To rehash this over and over again each time I tell another person makes it even more agonizing.  Right now this post is the best I can do.  I'm sure you all understand.....

Answers Bring More Questions

Please be patient with me as I cope....life has really been throwing me for a loop and the latest was a very low blow.  While I've gotten answers there are more questions than ever.

Because of this, I have been and will be away from my blog for a short time.  Even though I won't be posting I will still be following all of you because your posts inspire me (more than you know) and keep me going. 

Stay inspired!

Crunch Time

I know it has been awhile since I've been around.  In fact I just checked my reader and I have over 750 blog posts that I haven't had a chance to read, nor do I know when I will.  What can I say?  It's "crunch time"!  Only 27 more days until the end of tax season!

While the season itself hasn't been very stressful, the hours and the thoughts of babies weigh heavily on me.  Round One of the drugs wasn't successful and I'm pretty sure that Round Two is heading the same way.  Call it "mother's intuition".  I'm beginning to think that trying to make this journey during tax season was a waste of time (and money), but I knew that we had to at least try.  I'm seriously contemplating taking the next cycle month "off" and starting again once tax season is officially over.

My stitching and sewing has been seriously lacking as well.  I did manage to stitch up a quick little piece for an exchange.  However I haven't been able to get it to the finishing stage.  Things went awry over the past weekend and my sewing machine was the furthest thing from my mind.  So, I'm planning on a speed date with my machine sometime this Sunday.

Well, I really must head off.  Lots of tax returns calling my name!

Happy Stitches!

Work, Work, Work

Thank you for all the kind comments about my model stitching.  I love model stitching for one of my dearest, sweetest friends and I can't wait until the next time that she asks me.

I wish I could say that I've been stitching over the last few weeks, but work has been terribly intense this year.  I've been working 60+ hours each week which means that I am gone from the house for over 70 hours during the week.  My only day off is Sunday and I spend most of the day catching up on sleep, laundry and various errands with Hubby.  Thank goodness there are only six more weeks to tax season!

I'm still working on the baby front as well.  The first round of fertility drugs didn't work.  I was extremely upset that it didn't work but in the back of my mind I knew it was a big possibility.  After all, when I went on the fertility medication with my regular OBGYN, it wasn't until I had an "off month" that I became pregnant.

We have already started Round 2 and I will again put my faith not only in God, but in modern medicine as well.  I'll also head back to the acupuncturist this week.  Honestly, I'm quite thankful for all of this work.  It allows for me to have less time to obsess on the idea of my future child.

Ohhh.....I hear movement upstairs.....looks like Hubby and the Pup are up.  It's family time!

Happy Stitches!

Emotions

This week has been another emotional roller coaster for me.  Good days and bad days are all mixing together.

It really started on Tuesday at lunch.  A hunch that I had last week was confirmed.  I found out that another co-worker is pregnant.  She's in her mid twenties and she has been going to a fertility clinic for PCOS.  How can I not be happy for her?  How can I not feel sad for my husband and myself?  The worst part about it all, this co-worker works under me, so I will have major contact with her for the next three and a half months as tax season rolls on.  (I don't know if I mentioned it earlier, but there is also another co-worker who is pregnant with twins.  I will have to see her, but at least I won't have to work closely with her.)

On Wednesday morning I got the results from the tests that the doctor ran during my D&C.  The reason it took so long is that the lab had to grow the cells.  The result?  46, XY....a genetically perfect baby boy with no chromosonal issues.  All in all I am trying to take comfort in the fact that this is very good news.  Still, there is no explanation as to why his little heart stopped beating.  At this point my family and I just think that his little heart wasn't strong enough and he decided that it was easier to go see God when he did instead of putting us through further pain.

Yesterday, Thursday, seemed to be a good day......I didn't cry at the drop of a hat like the day before.  I started putting my life back in order and I began to make plans that involved a couple of new doctor appointments.  The first was for my primary care physician so that I could get her up to speed.  The second appointment was for a reproductive specialist recommended by my OBGYN.  So, even though I was feeling anxious, I was focused on the future.  It didn't matter that the specialist may cost us more money than we have.  I wasn't even too upset at the possibility that insurance won't cover anything because they could consider this a fertility issue instead of a history of miscarriages.  I knew that my husband and I have the support of our families.....both emotional and monetary (if the need should arise).

I came home from work with a smile on my face and a new attitude about life.  I had a wonderful dinner with my husband (that he cooked!) and then we sat down to enjoy some TV before heading off to bed.  I picked up my model stitching and happily put needle and thread to fabric.  Then the phone rang.  It was Hubby's cousin.....with news I didn't want or need to hear..........

THEY ARE PREGNANT



She's 11 weeks along, so they knew when we saw them over the Christmas holiday.  They told most of the family then, but they kept it a secret from us because of what we had just been through.  Both Hubby and I knew they were acting weird during the holiday and now we know why.  Deep down I am happy for the both of them.  They are both a year younger than I am, so I know how she felt about time ticking away and wanting to add at least one little one the the family.  Still, it really cut like a knife when she told me.  Thankfully I was able to hold back the tears until after I hung up the phone.

Sigh..............

Still I cry as I type this.  But I'm trying to be strong.  My OBGYN is sending me to the best place on the East Coast for reproductive medicine.  In fact, the first IVF baby in the United States was born at this Institute.  I also found out that while my MIL worked in alumni affairs at the medical school she worked closely with the doctor that I will be seeing.  I kind of feel like the puzzle pieces are falling into place and I'm trying to ignore the hiccups of hearing that other people are pregnant.  I'm trying to keep the faith, but sometimes I wonder why God allows me to handle so much!

One day at a time, right? 

I promise.......I'm trying!

Welcome 2012!

Christmas Wishes

Wishing you a very Merry Christmas!

Happy Hanukkah

From our house to yours........

Wishing you and yours a blessed Hanukkah.

With love,

Another Tough Goodbye

It is with a very sad and heavy heart that I come to my blog today.  It wasn't supposed to be this way....

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There was a reason that I haven't been blogging lately.  I have been so tired and worn out since my trip to Myrtle Beach for the PALS Retreat.  It was on that trip that I found out that I was pregnant again.  We were so very excited to finally get that positive pregnancy test, especially after a whole year of trying to conceive since the blighted ovium in October 2010.  I was just so tired by the end of the day and I didn't have the energy to blog, much less stitch.

We dubbed the little one "Aunt Millie's Miracle".  If you remember from a previous post, I got to see my Aunt two days before she passed away.  While I was there, we talked of the pregnancy struggles.  This sick and dying woman put her pain aside and told me that she was going to pray for "a big miracle".  Lo and behold, one month to the day of her passing we got our positive pregnancy test.

I had several appointments with my doctor and things were looking good.  On my confirmation appointment at 6 weeks the doctor did a vaginal ultrasound and my mom and I got to see the little bean with the beating heart.  It was the most amazing thing that I have ever seen in my life!  A little over a week and a half later we went back for the next routine appointment and this time Hubby got to see the miracle of our little one.

At Thanksgiving we told our Aunts, Uncles, Cousins and Grandparents. (Our parents already knew.)  We thought it would be okay to share the surprise with the close family and then we would let everyone else know at Christmas.

It seemed that everything was going well.  That is until a few days early last week.  I felt fine, but I was having a few minor cramps that I just chalked up to uterine stretching.  Then I noticed that my nausea seemed to be going away.  I tried not to think anything of it and I tried to chalk it up to the fact that I was headed towards the end of the first trimester.  After all, that is when the nausea is supposed to subside.

On Thursday we went for the next routine ultrasound.  Instead of being 10 weeks and 1 day, the little one was measuring 9 weeks 3 days.  Best guess by the doctor is that our little one had passed five days earlier.  The doctor scheduled a follow up ultrasound followed by a D&C.

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Today we said goodbye to our little one.

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Needless to say I am an angry, upset mess.  THIS WASN'T SUPPOSED TO HAPPEN!  Everything was falling into place.  I should be here telling you about the new little bundle of joy who will be arriving June 27, 2012 instead of telling you about our bundle's passing.  Hopefully our doctor will be able to get some tangible results and may even be able to tell us what or why this happened this time.

I know that God won't give me more than I can handle, but I didn't think I would to have to handle this again.

**********

So, understandably, I will be taking a break from blogging for awhile, but I will still be following the Traveling Pattern progress.  While I'm away I hope to pour my grief into another sampler to honor our little bean.

One Year Ago

One year ago today..........I was feeling very anxious.

One year ago today..........My parents came to give me support.

One year ago today..........My mother in law lent me her strength.

One year ago today..........My husband was by my side trying to make me laugh.

One year ago today..........I was put under anesthesia.

One year ago today..........It was finalized.  I lost you. 

Do you know that when you are having a miscarriage and you go in for a D&C that they still call it an abortion?  I read that on the paperwork that I had to sign and I cried.  It wasn't as if I had made that choice.

I'm still crying today.  I promise.......I won't forget you.

Boardwalk Art Show

Before my Sunday was so rudely interrupted, Hubby and I were having a wonderful day...... 

With Hubby's new job, he only works one Sunday a month (either the second to last, or last Sunday) instead of working every Sunday like he used to.  And, even though he is now working more hours a week, it seems that we are able to spend a bit more quality time together. 

Sunday's quality time was spent in a neighboring city.  This is the time of year where the locals take back their town from the vacationers and we decided it would be fun to participate.  So, we went down to the Boardwalk Art Show.  Our pup went with us and had a fantastic time walking around with us.  We even took him down on the sand so that he could romp and play.  This was the first time he had been on the sand all year long.  (Sorry, no pics....forgot the camera!)

This art show has tons of talent from all over the United States.  I love shows like this!  We always look for something unusual and different that we can give as a gift for the holidays.  This year it was a grilling spatula for my BIL (Hubby's brother).  The spatula had his (and my) Alma matter on it.  It was exciting to see our school logo on merchandise.  After all, we just started our football team a few years ago and we just became part of the CAA in the last year or so.  We aren't one of the schools you would recognize, but hopefully that will change soon.  Anyway, if you want more info on the spatulas, just contact John Monroe of PaddyPrints at sportulas@paddyprints.com .

The next item was a selfish purchase.  As I said, I'm always on the look out for unusual and different and I found it at Silver Spoon Jewelry.  I had a very hard time choosing only one item as they were all very different from anything I've ever seen. 

Check out the site and let me know if you end up with any of the goodies.  I have a feeling that there is another piece of this jewelry in my future. (Hint, hint Hubby!)

Last but not least, we found a photographic artist that really blew our minds.  Hubby (and I) love photography, so after hearing about his process and seeing his work, we knew we had to go home with one of his pictures.  Again, there were a few top contenders, but we ended up with this one.  (Sorry for the craptastic photograph.....it is still in the cellophane until we find a frame.  It was so hard to photograph!)

Natulus by Pat Little Images

The photographer, Pat Little, said it took 2,312 separate photos to create this image.  AMAZING!  You should really see it in person.  I tried to look him up on the web, but it seems that his website is still under construction. So, if you are interested, I do have a phone number that I would be happy to share.

I can't wait for the next art show or craft fair in our area.  I just love finding new stuff, don't you?

Happy Stitches!

Oh What a Beautiful Morning

Yes, it is another beautiful morning here in the Serial Starter home! I'm on Day 2 of English Bulldog Freedom and I'm enjoying every minute of it. This morning I spent time with my puppy without the slobbering and snorting from our unwanted house guest. I even had a cup of coffee while catching up on the final season of Desperate Housewives. What bliss!!


Anyway, here's a little bit of what I had intended on posting on Sunday evening:


I have been on the receiving end of three beautiful packages.  The first package came from Mouse.  I'm sure you remember, I talked about it here.  This is a quick snap of what she sent.

I also received my Fall "Friends Stitching Through the Seasons" exchange from Nan.  She really spoiled me this round with lots of lovelies.

I just love my new pincushion!  It's so fall!

My last package was a huge surprise. Some time ago I participate in a Blackbird Designs exchange where I was on the losing end. The person who had my name never fulfilled her side of the exchange and I was left empty handed. Well, Judy (the person I sent my exchange to) found out and she sent me the loveliest package to make up for my loss.

You should see Judy's finishing in person.  Her rouching is wonderful and I will be using what she did as a model for trying it myself.  I just hope that I can make mine half as beautiful as hers!

While it has been nice visiting with everyone this morning, I really have to get motivated.  I hope to have another wonderful morning to share with you tomorrow along with the rest of what I had intended to post.

Happy Stitching!

Peace...But For How Long?

Last night I started to write a post about my current status.  I started off talking about the dog situation and I continued on with tales about the goodies that have recently hit my mailbox.  I had intended to finish up my post with some finishes and an update on Mouline Rouge .

Long story endless, hubby and I ended up having quite the disagreement about my posting.  He was quite perturbed about the fact that I was posting while we were watching a movie together.  He felt like I was neglecting him and paying more attention to my blogging friends. (Should I even mention that we had just spent the whole day together doing fun things around town? Plus, based on my number of not so in depth posts over the last 38 days, I think I've been doing just the opposite!)    Basically it came down to the fact that he didn't like that I was blogging.  When I told him that there were things I didn't like either he wanted me to expand on my comment.  I just pointed to the floor and said "I don't like the fact that he is still here"........

He may look innocent, but he is 60 pounds of holy terror!

Fifteen minutes later hubby took the dog back to his father's house!  Woo hoo!  The streak ends at 38 days!

It was so peaceful in my house this morning.  My downstairs even smelled just like the plug in from Bath & Body Works instead of "Nasty Dog".  Ahhhh........

I'm just wondering how long the bliss will last because we still have the dog's bed, bowl and food.  Hubby didn't take that with him when he took the dog back last night.  UGH!

Happy Stitches!

Millie Cookies

I'm so glad that I had a chance to visit Aunt Millie on Monday.  We had a nice little visit and I was able to tell her how much I loved her.  And, although she was in great pain, her thoughts were not about her own pain.  She was concerned about me.  She wanted to know how I was doing and she told me that she would "pray for a miracle" regarding our attempts to start a family.  That was just like Aunt Millie......always giving love....

On Wednesday, September 21, 2011 Millie took her last breath.

My cousin Stewart wrote a beautiful tribute to Aunt Millie.  I hope you will take a moment to read it.

Happy Stitches!

I Can't Take It

They say that God doesn't give you more than you can handle.  Boy, he must be giving me much more credit than I'm giving myself.

Yesterday we went to visit my FIL.  Can you say "disastrous visit"?  All he did was complain.  When he wasn't complaining, he was asking us to do things for him and then he would yell at us for doing them.  The last straw was when he threw his phone across the couch like a 2 year old child.  That was our cue to go home. 

Once we got home, we tried to relax.  Hubby and I tried to spend some quality time together, even if it was to just sit on the couch while watching TV.  Hubby made a yummy dinner which was cut extremely short.  While eating dinner I noticed that my puppy's right eyelid was swollen and about twice its normal size.  I couldn't eat another bite.  I was worried sick!  He is my little baby boy!  We ended up taking him to the ER Vet because I didn't think it should wait until morning.  Thankfully, the vet said that he didn't see any kind of foreign body that would/could cause the swelling, but to be safe he put the pup on some steroids fo rthe swelling and sent us on our way home.  So, $80 later the swelling has gone down and we are keeping a close eye (no pun intended) on our son.

Then, today I got word from my mother that my (great) Aunt is in the hospital.  She broke her elbow back in July and has been in and out of the hospital and rehab.  Now she is back in the hospital and it doesn't look good.  She is having lots of problems with her heart and kidneys and now she has a blood clot in her leg.  They can't give her more than Tylenol for her arm because of her kidneys and they can't give her a blood thinner for the clot because of her heart.  Right now they are doing everything they can to keep her comfortable.  I'm just glad that I was able to visit her this evening to tell her I love her.

So, please God.....enough already!

Just Checking In

It has been a long, drawn out start to September.  My father in law ended up in the hospital a week earlier than planned due to his poor health.  Basically, he wasn't taking care of himself and they wanted to "beef him up" before the surgery which was on the 7th.  He received his colostomy as planned and he has been out of the hospital for about four days now.  The sad thing is that he is reverting back to not eating.  He says that he just can't stand the sight of food.  He seems to think that by drinking Ensure he is getting everything he needs.  All I can say is that if he keeps this up he will be back in the hospital in no time and we can't have that!

As you can well imagine, that damn dog is still an unwelcome house guest.  We have him in a kennel during the day while we are not at home.  The kennel also serves as his personal bedroom at night.  I just don't trust that dog any further than I can throw him and I can tell you that 60 pounds doesn't go very far.  He has managed to pee in the house on more than one occasion and the kennel is the only way that I can be sure he won't do anything if we can't be home to watch him. 

I've also begun to carry a water bottle with me whenever I'm at home.  The instant the damn dog begins to do something that he isn't supposed to do he gets a shot of water.  Most of the time he will stop, but tonight he barked back at me.  I just nailed him again with more shots of water and the barking quickly stopped.  This household requires discipline!  (And lately it has also required tons of Fabreeze as this dog STINKS!  I've never smelled such a foul dog odor as I have with this dog.)

While I'm more than ready for the damn dog to go back to my father in law, he isn't even capable of taking care of himself.  So, we are stuck since Hubby's brother refuses to help.  We are now on day 24 and I think I may just have to check myself into the funny farm to get away from it all.

On a bright note, I had a lovely little package from Mouse.  She sent some bath petals and chocolate.  Thanks so much Mouse!  As soon as that damn dog is gone I'm going to take a real long, hot bath.  I will be able to soak my cares away and take in all the lovely scents instead of the rotten dog smell.

Believe it or not, I've managed to get a bit of stitching in.  I have pictures somewhere on the camera, but honestly, I just don't feel like messing with it.  I feel like this whole last year (since October 2010) has been nothing but heartache and bad moods.  I'm so ready for it to end.  I'm ready for some happiness!

I'm going to be very busy with work for the next week (thanks to the extended tax deadlines for our area because of Hurricane Irene), so between that and taking care of the father in law issue I'll probably still be gone more than I am here.  I'll try to keep up with your blogs and I'll be keeping an eye out for the status of our Traveling Pattern.

Thank you all for hanging in there! 

Keep some happiness in your stitches!

September Arrives

I wish that I could say that I was thankful that it is now September.  For the second year in a row, August will go on record as being more "unhappy" than "happy".  Unfortunately, it seems that September has begun where August has left off.

My father in law is in the hospital.  A week earlier than predicted.  Of course, he did nothing about his dog situation and now we have been saddled with his burden.  I'm trying everything I can do, short of turning the dog over to a shelter, to get the dog out of my house.  The promise of "only a few days" has turned into well past a week and is now looking like months.  (Yes....MONTHS!)

I'm a rotten miserable wreck!

That having been said, I need to take an extended leave.  I need to deal with issues at home because this is really starting to cause a rift between my husband and I.  The horrible thing is that it shouldn't.  But, yet again my FIL puts his misery on others.......no wonder my MIL divorced him!

I hope to be back soon...........with one less English Bulldog in my house!

Woe Is Me

 Some people are never happy.

Take my father in law.  You never hear a kind word emanate from his lips.  A smile never hits his face.  I don't even think that he knows how to laugh.  With his attitude, I'm not surprised that my mother in law divorced him 15+ years ago. 

I really should preface this a little.  My father in law has had Crone's Disease for many years.  About 10 years ago he had surgery to remove part of his large intestine to help with the symptoms of this disease. Almost a year ago he had a pacemaker put in after he had a mild heart attack.  (It was his second heart attack.  He had his first over 30 years ago around age 40.)  So, as you can see, my father in law is not in the best of health and his high anxiety levels don't help either.  He is now going to have to have surgery (again) for his Crone's.  Only this time they will have to fit him with a colostomy bag.  Now, while it sounds gross, it will give him his life back and he will feel so much better.  However these things are not an excuse to try to make everyone else miserable right along with him.

Now, he is attempting to bring his "Woe is me" onto DH and myself yet again.  He is in a predicament that was self created and yet he tries to make it our problem.

About three years ago he moved from his condo into an "active adult retirement community".  You know, one of those 55 and up places that don't allow kids.  While this was a great idea for him, he did not consider the fact that this new condo community had rules.  The rule affecting him the most was the one stating that all dogs living there must be under 30 pounds.  While that is not a problem for someone like me, it is for my father in law.  He feels like he has the right to break these rules with his dog Winston.  (Winston is a 50 pound "Miniature English Bulldog".)

Long story endless, the condo association has sued my father in law.  He went to court and the judge basically put in back in the hands of the condo association.  My father in law now has a petition that has been signed by over 75% of the homeowners that states that they would support a decision to let Winston stay. 

While the association is making its decision, he wants us to take the dog because he could be fined if the dog is still there after August 24th.  While Winston is cute, he is not neutered and he doesn't behave.  Our dog hates being around him and constantly snaps at Winston if he comes near.  Winston also won't listen to me at all and only sometimes listens to DH.  He is just a big bully of a dog and we can't keep him.

If the condo association doesn't let Winston stay, I don't think that this will end well at all.  I know that he will want us to keep Winston, but I won't agree to that.  (I know that there are many "rescues" for these dogs, but I haven't looked into them yet. I feel that this is something my father in law should do for Winston if he can't keep him.)  I'm sure that if my father in law has to give up the dog he will blame me for not allowing the dog to stay with us.  I guess if I comes down to it than I will just have to live with the blame. 

Sigh........I really wish August would end and that September will bring some positive news for a change.......I'm sick and tired of all the drama!

I'm Not Laughing!

So, I've come to the conclusion that this is just not going to be my month.  Forget the fact that my birthday is in four days.  It doesn't matter.  Plus, I'm another year older!  Who wants that?

Wonder why I'm aggravated?  Well, here's just a few choice items over the past couple of days:

1. Just spent a fair chunk of $ on husband's new work wardrobe since he didn't have any extra money saved for this (...and I did????).  But, I can't send him into a professional environment in shorts and t-shirts, can I?
2. Doctor put me on medicine that isn't covered by insurance because the insurance company doesn't feel that it is "medically necessary".  (It is to me!)
3. My Nook?  Well, Barnes & Noble wants to send the replacement to the Virgin Islands. (Yes, they shipped it to the Virgin Islands!)  That is about 1,500 miles away from where I live.  When I called to complain and change the shipping address to the correct one I had to call twice and my second call ended up lasting 50 minutes!
4. My Internet at home stopped working properly.  We thought it was our old computer.  But no......it isn't.  Our new computer recognizes the wi-fi just fine but it shows no connectivity.  Looks like I'll be on the phone with the Internet provider tonight. ETA: Looks like internet is fixed (for now) on the two new computers.  The old computer still won't recognize the wifi and I'm not in the mood to deal with it.  I think we will just make the old laptop a "permanent" resident on the desk so that it can be hooked in directly to the internet.
5. Husband still hasn't made the second half of the truck payment that is due this month.  I normally wouldn't worry too much, but he won't have a paycheck until after the payment is due.  (Not sure what money tree I'm going to pluck that payment from!)
6. My vacation........well, it is beginning to look like a staycation based on Hubby's new job. (At least that means we won't be spending money on gas and eating out.)
7. The stock market continues to plummet and I'm watching my retirement get flushed down the drain.  (I can't do much about this, so I just shrug my shoulders and hope it will rebound in the next 20 years.)

Now that I reread my list, I do have to say that there are a few spots that lightly glimmer.  After all, the money spent on Hubby's wardrobe gained me some Kohl's cash, so it looks like I will be able to get myself a few things starting Wednesday.  And my vacation?  Well, if it does end up a staycation it will mean that I can get some serious cleaning/reorganizing/stitching/sewing done while Hubby works.  See?  I'm trying to put a positive spin on this!

So, where's the chocolate????